Marriage Preparation

PreCana Sessions

To download the contents of this page as a Word Document click here: Marriage Preparation Booklet.doc

Wedding Preparation Booklet (acrobat pdf file... 49kb)

"If we love one another, God will live in us in perfect love"
1 John 4:12

"Over all these virtues put on love, which binds the rest together and makes them perfect." 
Colossians 3:14

Wedding Guidelines

Pre-Cana

Ceremony

Planning the Liturgy for your Marriage

Planning your celebration

Ongoing Support

Prayer before Marriage

Wedding Guidelines

We are delighted that you have chosen to celebrate your marriage at _______________.In the Roman Catholic tradition, Marriage is a Sacrament. The bride and the groom contract their marriage in the presence of God.For a marriage to be sacramental, two baptized persons, at least one being Catholic...

  • Freely enter into a vowed commitment of respect, reverence and love.

    Making this promise for a lifetime.

    This commitment includes the promise of fidelity.

  • It also includes an openness to bearing children, providing for their good and bringing them up in the faith.

The exchange of promises between the bride and groom is a commitment to one another for life, even as God is faithful. Thus the couple’s love and pledge of fidelity, become a sign of God’s love for God’s people. This powerful promise speaks to all assembled, of who God is for us.The priest (deacon), the families of the couple, the attendants and the assembled gathering of friends, witness what the bride and groom promise.The Church will be reserved for you and the date for your wedding will be set only after you have had your initial interview with ________________________.The following guidelines will help you as you make your plans.Baptismal InformationContact the Church where you were baptized and ask for a recently dated copy of your Baptismal certificate. Parishes are used to providing this information and it is usually obtained by a simple phone call to the parish secretary.If you do not know the location of the Church, the National Church Directory, which we have in our parish office, may be of help.

Pre-Cana

All couples preparing for the Sacrament of Marriage are required to participate in either Pre-Cana or Engaged Encounter. Schedules for both of these forms of marriage preparation will be provided at the time of your initial interview. Pre-Cana must be completed at least 4 months before your wedding date.If one or both of you have been married before you should participate in the diocesan Second Marriage program. Please be sure you pick up this information at the rectory. The Second Marriage program should be completed at least 3 months before your wedding date.

Should unresolved issues arise, they can be dealt with in adequate time, or if appropriate, a wedding can be postponed. Register early because sessions fill as much as 3 months before the date.

With This Ring

Ceremony

Couples may plan to be married at either a Nuptial Mass or a Nuptial Ceremony. Either celebration will be well planned by the couple, together with ________________________ and the priest or deacon who presides.If you attend Mass regularly, you may choose to be married at Mass. If you do not attend Mass regularly or if many of your guests are not Catholic, you may decide to be married in a Wedding ceremony which is a Liturgy of the Word.If you have a relative or personal or family friend who is a priest or deacon whom you would like to preside at your marriage, mention this at the time of your wedding interview. It is preferable to have a presider who is known to you and your family.If your fiance is of another faith and would like to have a minister or rabbi be part of the ceremony, mention this at the time of your initial planning.

Planning the Liturgy for your Marriage

At the time of your Pre Cana, you will be given material which will help you to plan your wedding celebration. About two months before your wedding, make an appointment with __________________________ for help in planning your liturgy. We very much want your celebration to reflect your choices of prayers, readings, and special participation.Some of the ways in which family members and friends can participate in special ways are:

  • Proclaiming the Scripture readings
  • Reading the Prayer of the Faithful
  • Bringing up the gifts
  • Serving as Ministers of Communion

Each of these ministries presumes some training and experience. Please choose people who are experienced to serve as these special ministers.There are several books to help you choose appropriate readings.

Planning Your Celebration

Music

There are some restrictions on the music which may be used at a Church wedding. Be sure to talk this over with a competent Church musician.Ideally, you will plan some music which the congregation can sing so that all can praise God and pray together for you in music. Using only instrumental music or only a soloist is usually discouraged at Catholic weddings. Using recorded music is also discouraged. Please consult your "Wedding Music" brochure.As you plan your music think of the following considerations: Does this music fit the context of this liturgical celebration? Is the music technically and esthetically good? Will it help this assembly to pray? Please check with the parish regarding our practice for musicians.

Flowers

Flowers may be left in Church or taken to your reception. Let ______________ know ahead of time what your plan is. Be sure to let your florist know where you want them placed in the sanctuary. No flowers will be placed on the altar

Offering

The suggested diocesan offering of $75.00 should be made at the time of finalizing your wedding liturgy.The fee for the organist, for consultation and ceremony, is ordinarily $60.00 without a singer or instruments, $80.00 for a wedding with a singer or instruments, and one rehearsal. This fee will increase if several rehearsals are required.Our parish organist, _______________________________, is available to play at your wedding if she is not already booked. She will also recommend music and possible vocalists. Contact her as soon as your date is scheduled.

Photography

Our church is beautiful and we want your celebration to be beautiful also. Instruct your photographer to remain on the sidelines and in no way obstruct your ceremony.You may remain in Church for photos after your celebration. If your wedding is scheduled for Saturday afternoon, keep in mind, that because Confessions are scheduled in Church at 4:15 p.m. all photography must conclude at 4:00 p.m., no later.The enclosed Guideline is to be given to your photographer

Marriage License

Bring your marriage license to the rehearsal. Your witnesses will sign the papers then. The priest or deacon will sign on the day of your ceremony and _________________________ will send the papers in.

Rehearsal

Your rehearsal will be planned for one or two days before your celebration. This must be scheduled at the time when the wedding is arranged to be sure that the Church will be available when you want it.Ordinarily the rehearsal will last about 45 minutes. All members of the wedding party should be present. Readers may also practice their readings on the microphone at this time. It is advisable not to invite additional guests to the rehearsal.If you have carefully thought through how you want your wedding to proceed, the rehearsal should not take a long time.There may be no consumption of any alcoholic beverage on the Church property at the time of the rehearsal or wedding.

Reception

Neither ____________________ nor the priest or deacon who presides at your wedding will assume they are invited to the reception. If you would like them to come, invite them well in advance of the wedding date.

Contacts to schedule

Plan on a minimum of six contacts with the parish prior to the day of your wedding:

  • Initial interview: To get acquainted, fill out necessary preliminary paper-work, which includes determining your freedom to marry, setting your date and discussing diocesan and parish guidelines.
  • Second interview: Attitudinal questionnaire - this is a discussion of the couple’s understanding of marriage and readiness to make a permanent commitment. At this time there will also be a preliminary discussion of your marriage ceremony.
  • Contact musician for consultation, early on.
  • Pre-Cana or Engaged Encounter (here or elsewhere).
  • Meeting to finalize plans for your Marriage liturgy - Call to set this date well ahead of your ceremony. At this time, please plan to make an offering to the church. The suggested diocesan offering is $75.00.
  • Rehearsal - the entire wedding party should attend.

Conclusion

These months of preparation for your marriage will be busy and exciting. If you find that there are ways in which the parish staff can be of help, please call.While your engagement, showers, rehearsal, reception and honeymoon are all significant parts of the celebration of your marriage, the Marriage Ceremony is seen as the center of the Christian celebration.The prayers, scripture readings, the vows, the giving and receiving of rings, the music, the nuptial blessing - all of these, for you, will be an expression of both faith in God and in each other. They will also express your confidence that the presence and love of God will strengthen and confirm your love for each other.May these days of preparation hold many blessings!

After the Ceremony

Having made the decision to be married in the Church, don’t forget to follow through and register in the parish as a newly wed couple. This may mean the simple change of name and address if you are continuing to worship in the Church where you were married, or a new registration if you are moving elsewhere.

Ongoing Support

The Catholic Church wants very much to be a presence in your lives as a couple. Please be attentive to parish activities, as there may be enrichment possibilities for you. Also, when you decide to start a family, please be in touch with the parish staff regarding baptism information and preparation. Congratulations! United in Christ

Prayer Before Marriage

Lord God,
Source of all love,
your providence has brought us together.
As we prepare for the sacrament of marriage
we pray for your grace,
that, strengthened by your blessing,
we may grow in respect for one another
and cherish each other with a sincere love.
We ask this through Christ our Lord.
Amen.May the God of love and peace
abide in us, guide our steps,
and confirm our hearts in his love,
now and for ever.
Amen.

Wedding Guidelines for Photographers

Couples being married at _____________________________ ask their photographer to respect the sacredness of this Church and the holiness of the commitment they are celebrating. Therefore, the photographer is expected to abide by the following guidelines and do nothing that will distract from the ceremony itself.

Photos may be taken in the center aisle before Mass begins and from the choir loft, front side aisles or back, during Mass.

A video camera may be set up in the choir loft or front side aisles and may run throughout the ceremony, provided it is not moved and the photographer does not move about in a distracting way.

Be sure that the placement of your equipment does not obstruct the flow of traffic in the side aisle at Communion time.

To keep the focus on the Mass, the Wedding Ceremony and the Bride and Groom, no photos may be taken from anywhere in the sanctuary during the ceremony. The sanctuary is the area beyond the bottom step and includes the side altar areas.

No flash photos may be taken during the homily or during the Eucharistic Prayer, the consecration or communion of Mass.

Upon arrival at the Church, the photographer is asked to see _________________ or the presiding priest or deacon, give them his or her business card or name in writing, and acknowledge that they are familiar with these guidelines.

If a photographer does not respect these guidelines, he or she will not be welcome to photograph any other wedding at ______________________.

For a Saturday wedding, all photography must be completed no later than 4:00 p.m